Have you heard about Dr. Aron’s study in “interpersonal closeness” yet? Basically it is a list of questions created by a psychologist that was designed to make people fall in love… with science. There are 36 questions in all and they’re meant to reveal aspects of our personalities, our dreams and our pasts – ultimately they help a partner gain a true understanding of yourself, while also making you both feel vulnerable, which apparently is a big part of falling in love and feeling close to someone.
I first heard about ’em on Hallie’s blog where she did a little reader experiment to see how the questions worked on any relationship, not just the romantic type, and challenged other bloggers to open up and do the same.
So now I’m just a blogger just standing in front of her readers, asking them to love her…
But my cheesiness aside, I think there really is something powerful and refreshing about opening up and being real. The blog world is full of perfect outfits and beautiful images, but let’s face it, that is A. not real life and B. not really giving a glimpse of who we are, as people.
Here we go… Challenge accepted, Hallie. I’m answering a selection of the 36 questions (and if you’re reading this, I’d love for you to answer some of ’em as well on your blog or in comments!)
Would you like to be famous? In what way? I’d love to be well known or widely appreciated for my accomplishments career and maybe even blog-wise, but I’d never want to be celebrity famous. I’m too much of a introvert to enjoy the non-stop lifestyle or lack of privacy that tends to go with being a celebrity.
Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why? I prepare for important calls overall (having background on who I am talking to, doing some research, having an idea of what I’d like to get out of it, etc.) but I don’t rehearse exactly what I’m going to say. I tend to be a bit of a spontaneous speaker – sometimes the best things that come out of my mouth are the things I just make up on the spot (and sometimes I can’t even remember exactly what I said!)
What would constitute a “perfect” day for you? Waking up early to make the most of the day but not rushing to get out of bed and get going. Warm (but not hot) weather and sunshine. A great latte and an almond croissant. Exploring with B and Callie by my side. Taking lots of photos to remember it all (I get really sappy and sentimental with things). Having dinner and a glass of wine outdoors. Watching the sunset. Ending the day on the couch with a big bowl of ice cream.
If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? Mind, hands down. I want to be able to share my stories, experiences and perspectives for as long as possible. The physical aspect of getting old isn’t exactly great but I want to stay sharp in order to make the most of my life and truly enjoy my time with those around me.
Name three things you and your partner readers appear to have in common. // 1 -We’re about figuring things out for ourselves and don’t rely on others to do it for us // 2 – We appreciate the little things // 3 – We have a sense of adventure and are excited about what’s still ahead.
For what in your life do you feel most grateful? I’m grateful every single day for the people I have in my life, from family to friends. I’m surrounded by those who inspire me, support me and really truly want what’s best for me (even when that means moving away from them or doing something kind of crazy like quitting my job)
If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? I wish I had traveled more growing up and been exposed to a more diverse culture. I grew up in a pretty small town and really envy those who experienced more of the world while they were young.
If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be? I’d love to be able to actually relax and feel relaxed. My mind is always racing – whether it be thinking through everything I need to do, daydreaming of future adventures, or plotting out new projects to tackle – and I really never feel truly relaxed. I think that being able to turn “off” would do me a lot of good.
What do you value most in a friendship? I value friends who can listen, but also be completely honest with me. Let me vent but then be real with me when I’m overreacting or being a pain in the ass.
If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why? I’d stop worrying about always having a plan and focus on just going with it. My “planner” personality helps with a lot of things, but it also holds me back sometimes because I haven’t thought through everything or all of the pieces aren’t exactly in the right place. I’d spend my final year ditching the “plans” and lists, and instead being more spontaneous. Less stress, more fun.